This is ADHD on relationships, and welcome back to day two. So yesterday, we really started to explore about kind of how ADHD shows up in different types of relationships and those types of relationships. And today, I think it's good to get us both on the same level, ADHD partner, and non ADHD partner or ADHD and ADHD. I'm just really wanting to get everybody up to scratch on ADHD. However we're going to do this a little bit differently. I could give you the facts and figures on ADHD and how they present and how they may not. But I feel like a lot of people have done that, you can go on YouTube online, and we kind of know the facts. But taking the facts and putting them to context is a very different story. When I was diagnosed, my partner is neurotypical. And he was trying to understand what ADHD was. And obviously, I went into super hyper focus over ADHD, and my partner tried to do all that he could. I kept sending him videos, after videos after videos, and he was taking in all this knowledge. But I never really sat down with him and told him how ADHD shows up from my perspective, not from a book, or a podcast. And yet it was useful in knowing all these facts. However, it was just facts, not context. And I wanted him to understand. And we had that opportunity. And that's what we're going to explore today.So I invite the ADHD individual, whether this is both of you, or one of you in the friendship, or partner or relationship, and I want you to try and find a way of showing your partner how ADHD shows up in your life. The good, the challenges and what your experience up to now has been like, living, undiagnosed or diagnosed with ADHD. And how you do this, well, that's fun, it's up to you. You can text, you can call, you can do it face to face, a drawing, a letter. Whatever you need to do to share that perspective with your partner, is all I want you to do. Now for the other partner, the partner that may not have ADHD, when they present this information to you, I want you to really take a step back and really listen. You know, we call this in the coaching world "active listening", where you are a neutral observer, someone that's coming in with no agenda, no assumptions, and no outcome. You're just simply listening to your partner's perspective and their truth as it is not what you know, not what you experience. But as it is pure, neutral observer. And if you both have ADHD, then you could swap roles, right or do twice. One of you take one one of you take the other.I invite you to try it out today. The individual with ADHD, this is your time to be heard. And the non ADHD, this is your turn to try and listen and understand from their perspective. Me and my partner did a similar thing after a while and we got a whole night off and had a nice dinner, made it a safe place, and I just sat and shared and shared. And it opened up a lot more doors than any book or any podcast ever could. Because it was real and it was ours. Ned Halliwell says "the right diagnosis can tie marriages and lives around. Without this. They feel shame, frustration. Without the diagnosis. People can't make use of that talent". So you've got your diagnosis now. So share what that's like for you and the other partner, listen, that's all you've got to do. Lets everybody get on the same page and start fresh so we can move forward and try and work with ADHD rather than against it.